“I think that people today are so fixated on finding Mr. “One [of my friends] has been alone for as long as I've known her because no one meets her physical standards.
And I have another who has dated everyone she knows for a short period of time, but she's constantly trying to 'upgrade,' so she's never happy.” But what are some signs that you, like Gillian’s friends, have sky-high expectations preventing you from seeing the great guy right in front of you? You Can’t Put Your Finger on Why He’s Not Good Enough You say “he’s just not my type,” but you can’t come up with concrete reasons why.
Every girl deserves a good guy, but let’s be realistic–there’s only one Ryan Gosling, and he’s not available to most of us.
No, it’s not wrong to have standards, but are your standards impossible to reach?
But as picky as I seemed to be, there was still that unforgettable time where I found myself at a lunch/intervention with my besties asking me what in the world happened to my standards. I stayed in relationships longer than I should have and tried to convince myself that it was right, because they had it all on paper, or we had been together so long, or maybe just because I was getting old.
The episode made me think: what is the difference between being way too picky and simply having high standards?
I kind of hate when people say someone is “too picky” just because they have standards.
I experienced this struggle to find balance for most of my dating career. I never gave some guys a chance because they did not fit with what I felt a Christian man should be. In both cases, I spent way too much time trying to CONVINCE myself that either decision was the right one.
Whatever I did, I would feel guilty for being too picky or guilty for settling. I read a quote in Timothy Keller’s “The Meaning of Marriage” that said.. When I read this I realized that this described perfectly why I was being so picky! Picking a potential spouse can be viewed like looking for good materials, but not expecting the finished product.