Dating a white guy

In the past, I’d have sought that comfort out in a white man, but that night I knew it wouldn’t be enough.

It’s not that I don’t think white people are anxious; two months into Trump’s presidency, most of the white people in my life are activated.

Don't let the title fool you: Pairing happens in all ways… Even this insanely divisive period we're going through in the United States can't reverse the interracial relationship advances that are surely here to stay.

Black women and white men aren't the only diverse duo out there, but it's something to chat about if you've ever been in that type of relationship.

So what’s it like to date white guys when you’re not white? But there’s some cool words coming out too, you know. And seriously, whoever came up with the term ‘blowjob lips’?

Well, it’s exciting and intense and awkward-in-a-good-way for the first few months, and then it gets weird and annoying and you split up and then you see them on a date with someone else a month later and you die inside and have to drink all the wine to get over it. You want stuff that’s exclusive to the whole brown girl/white boy scenario? I have no idea whether that’s the African thing or just because I eat a lot of lasagne but it doesn’t matter. What a lot of people don’t realise is that when they start talking like that about lips, they’re not just being sexist fuckwits.

Black hair is an incredibly versatile and amazing topic, but if you weren't brought up around it, it can be confusing.

I grew up in a small town in the 90's, where I was the only non-white girl in my class at school and my skin colour was a curiosity rather than a threat.

There was no racial tension, but then again, no sense of black community. All the boys I crushed on were white; my first “boyfriend” (aged 10) was white and my first boyfriend (aged 14) was white.

Aside from the historical separation of black people and white people, there are a few barriers you should get out of the way in the present…

just so you're on the same page (and not one from an American history book).